Ribs and Rumps

Cheap, cheerful BBQ lands in The Dubai Mall, ideal for a meaty break from the shops 5 Reviews

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In a city full of classy steak shops, each dishing out their own Dhs400 version of grade-A wagyu beef, it’s refreshing, really, to stumble across a humble mega chain offering whole platters of cow for a measly Dhs90. Ribs and Rumps, which comes to Dubai from Australia, may not be sleek, or low-lit, or relaxing, or any of the things that one tends to shell out the big bucks for, but it certainly promises to satisfy any basic, beefy, barbecue craving you may have.

Squeezed between a noodle bar and an American diner, Ribs and Rumps is one of three lucky eating establishments to have risen above the general melee of the second floor food court in The Dubai Mall, and instead has been given a prime position overlooking the ice skating rink below. This is at once a treasure and a chore: while it’s hilarious to watch the children striking out straight-legged and soggy-bottom-bound, it does not really make up for the indecipherable, booming ‘music’ that accompanies them on their rounds. Not satisfied with such discord from one side, Ribs and Rumps, oddly, plays their own version of restaurant tinny pop. The result is two competing earfuls of equally unpleasant music. The cacophony that ensues takes the easy out of any sort of listening.

Trying hard to ignore the screaming kids and bib-wearing fools around us (what would Freud say about a room full of adults mimicking infants?), my date and I instead took to admiring the chunky steak knives, which hinted at the sheer size of things to come.

Neither the steak nor the ribs are award winning: the meat’s cheap and things are served in a bare-bones, fast food way. But that’s not why you come here, is it? You come here to dig in, throw quality to the wind, and enjoy the sheer madness of waitresses bringing whole racks of ribs to your table. You come for crisp chips and maybe some burgers and wings thrown in. If you’re a woman, you might come to shut the kids up (though this didn’t work in enough instances). And you come to do all that on the cheap.

To be fair, there isn’t much in the way of classy eats in The Dubai Mall, and given the barrage of fast food options, Ribs and Rumps can be a fun, effortless way to feed yourself and rest your glutes after traversing the Mall’s obscenely large expanse. Just don’t shorten the name to R ’n’ R, because you won’t find that here.

The bill (for two)
2x Coke Dhs14
1x Baked mushrooms Dhs30
1x 200g fillet Dhs90
1x Half rack of ribs Dhs65
1x Pepper sauce Dhs8
Total (including service) Dhs207

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