Keep your wig on
Which American A-list actor, in town for Dubai’s annual International Film Festival (DIFF) this week, wouldn’t fly over unless his personal hair stylists could accompany him to help him hide the fact that his famously healthy head of hair has in fact, had a some less-than-natural assistance? What would his Mummy (I, II or III) say about such excessive vanity, we wonder? Strangely, yet more hair/ DIFF-related news reached us this week: a member of superb Italian band Bella Donna, who performed as part of the Rhythm and Reels screenings last weekend, were stopped at the airport on their way in. Yawn. But the official reason, according to insiders? ‘Because his hair was too big.’ Better fashion a slick look next time you go through customs…
Dear Dubai shopping centres,
Don’t think us ungrateful. We appreciate the shelter and relentless supply of retail therapy you offer us during the otherwise unbearable summer months. But why, with every new opening, do you insist on calling yourselves ‘malls’ – when the very last priority on your PR list is shops? First it was Mall of the Emirates with Ski Dubai. Then The Dubai Mall with its shark-infested waters and Olympic ice skating rink. Now Mirdif City Centre is trumpting an indoor skydiving centre, planned to open next year. When was the last time you popped out to buy socks and ended up hurtling through the air with your cheeks tucked round your ears? Please, just rebrand yourselves extreme sports centres and we’ll stop feeling so embarrassed when we tell people where we spend all our time. Yours, The Insider.
For years now, Martin Metcalf’s lazy funk has helped The Insider ease into Saturday night. But we tuned in last weekend to hear him announce – or rant – that it was to be his last ever show on Dubai 92fm. ‘It’s been a pleasure working with everyone here – apart from the new lot, of course,’ he stated. We heard things were strained under 92’s new management – but we didn’t foresee DJs going out kicking and screaming. Please, we beg of you: don’t replace him with more chart hits.