‘Don’t Judge Me’ pleads one title, but it’s a little late for that. This ballad has Brown begging his new squeeze to ignore his misdemeanours, because they occurred before he knew he was in love with her (aw, shucks).
But Brown was soundly judged in 2009 and sentenced to five years’ probation, one year of domestic violence counselling and six months’ community service for an assault on his then partner, Rihanna.
The charge sheet for this fifth album includes unoriginality, a tedious obsession with intimate acts, and clichéd explicit lyrics we’ll refrain from quoting. The music cherry-picks production tropes from the likes of Kanye, Diplo and David Guetta, and the most successful tracks are those that recall Rihanna’s zeitgeist-grabbing Rated R album.
Oh, the irony.