In a tweet: There’s something fishy about the lack of fish at this aquatic affair. Best for brunch with more of a 'just lunch' feel.
The venue: At Sloane’s, it’s hard not to be overwhelmed with a feeling of being in the lobby. Coupled with closed blinds by the windows, from arrival the atmosphere is immediately lacking. Tables line the edges of the room, which also doesn’t help – wherever you choose to sit, you’ll never feel like you’re where the action is.
The food: Despite describing itself as a seafood brunch, the buffet doesn’t feel especially seafoody (there aren’t even any oysters, a disappointing omission, and apparently because ‘it’s too warm in Dubai at the moment’ to serve them), with mixed grills, chicken curries and cold cuts taking up as much, if not more, room. There’s a cold selection featuring sushi, crabs legs and a couple of fishy salads, plus a flat top where fillets of fish (including naughty hammour) are cooked to order. Unfortunately, these aren't cooked well on our visit - tasting overhwelmingly of acrid-tasting oil.
The drinks:The house beverage package apparently includes selected grape, hops and mixed drinks, but on our visit, we were only offered grape when we enquired what was included.
The crowd: Seems to be mainly made up of hotel guests, and not very many of them at that.
The dress code:Smart-casual – trousers and closed shoes for men.
The service: Seemingly very uninformed – we wouldn’t have gone for grape if we’d known we had other options. We were also not told when it was last orders, so missed out.
Extras & entertainment: None whatsoever.
Highs & lows: A lack of atmosphere, the price and the relatively small selection lets Sloane’s down.
The after party: Head somewhere lively like Q43 in Media City or Barasti – if you don’t want to just go home to bed, that is. You’ll be in need of a pick-me-up.
Dhs280 (soft drinks), Dhs430 (selected beverages). Fri 1pm-4pm. Grosvenor House Dubai, Dubai Marina, www.sloanes-dubai.com (04 317 6000).